Abraham talks about launching rockets of desire. When we encounter strong feelings about something we really don’t want to be the way it is, Abraham says we can see this as launching a strong rocket of desire. Well, this week, I launched a big, big rocket of desire, to the tune of an old familiar song….the I Want My Body to Look and Feel Differently song. Do you know that one? I find it easy to sing, and that’s funny, if you have ever heard me sing!
But, I’m a serious student of A Course in Miracles and I love Jeff Foster’s book The Deepest Acceptance and I’m in a 40 Day Program right now! We are near the end. Today is day 35. I’m supposed to have it all figured out and coast through on a miracle laced high, right?? Why this, why now??
I’ve renounced diets and emotional eating. I’m exercising. I’m eating when I am hungry. How could I feel this badly?
I’ve spend the last week reading books about overeating and repairing my metabolism and “recomp” and feeling a bit angry and guilty about the damage I’ve caused my body and psyche with my past dieting and exercising exploits. I could feel myself getting pulled into that vortex of “fixing,” and needing to be fixed, again. BUT, this time it’s different. A challenge is but a lesson we did not learn before, and we are given another chance to choose different (to very roughly paraphrase ACIM). I have been given yet another chance, and I was reminded to look within, just keep looking within.
What do you know, it has indeed all come together. (Thank you, Lavina. You were soooo right!!) I can’t even begin to map the path or log the gifts of learning as they came to me, but in bits and pieces, from friends and teachers, I got to a better place this morning about my body, my purpose, and God. And that’s all I can ask. Now, I am clear. Now, I feel good. Now, in this moment, I am clear about who I really am and why I am here. And yes, it’s going to be spiritual and physical. I am being helped by those who understand how to know God and by those who have really studied the body. I am accepting help, and taking responsibility. I’m stepping away from, yet again, blame of any kind. It doesn’t serve me or anyone else. This time I’m growing in love. I am recommitting to putting my beliefs into practice in my own life. I don’t believe lasting change is gained from punishment or coercion. So, I won’t do it to myself any more, and I forgive myself for attacking myself and others in the pursuit of my desires. I am here for a reason and I can best accomplish that from a state of love, forgiveness and appreciation. About everything. And everyone. Including myself, who is not this body. So, here I am, in this body, having yet another adventure, thankful for another day. Let’s play!
I love the fact that I couldn’t decide where this belonged, so I shared it on both my sites, Well-Being Journey and Namaste, Radiant One, because there is no separation. It is physical and spiritual. So be it. We are One.
I’ve renounced diets and emotional eating. I’m exercising. I’m eating when I am hungry. How could I feel this badly?
I’ve spend the last week reading books about overeating and repairing my metabolism and “recomp” and feeling a bit angry and guilty about the damage I’ve caused my body and psyche with my past dieting and exercising exploits. I could feel myself getting pulled into that vortex of “fixing,” and needing to be fixed, again. BUT, this time it’s different. A challenge is but a lesson we did not learn before, and we are given another chance to choose different (to very roughly paraphrase ACIM). I have been given yet another chance, and I was reminded to look within, just keep looking within.
What do you know, it has indeed all come together. (Thank you, Lavina. You were soooo right!!) I can’t even begin to map the path or log the gifts of learning as they came to me, but in bits and pieces, from friends and teachers, I got to a better place this morning about my body, my purpose, and God. And that’s all I can ask. Now, I am clear. Now, I feel good. Now, in this moment, I am clear about who I really am and why I am here. And yes, it’s going to be spiritual and physical. I am being helped by those who understand how to know God and by those who have really studied the body. I am accepting help, and taking responsibility. I’m stepping away from, yet again, blame of any kind. It doesn’t serve me or anyone else. This time I’m growing in love. I am recommitting to putting my beliefs into practice in my own life. I don’t believe lasting change is gained from punishment or coercion. So, I won’t do it to myself any more, and I forgive myself for attacking myself and others in the pursuit of my desires. I am here for a reason and I can best accomplish that from a state of love, forgiveness and appreciation. About everything. And everyone. Including myself, who is not this body. So, here I am, in this body, having yet another adventure, thankful for another day. Let’s play!
I love the fact that I couldn’t decide where this belonged, so I shared it on both my sites, Well-Being Journey and Namaste, Radiant One, because there is no separation. It is physical and spiritual. So be it. We are One.